been working on the layout for days now instead of pouring out my many many important thoughts. but now im bored of html and css and just want to talk. many such cases ^_*

i didnt get a chance to write down the really hard shit from the other night, but i did grab some screenshots, so if i just will she or nill she paste them in here what will that look like?

::tries it::

it looks like someone who doesnt know what they are doing is spreading chaos in their wake. so nevermind for now, i'll come back to it. so anyway the convo goes like this (slight paraphrasing)

them: did i ever tell you what i told [my best friend] the first time i saw you?

me: if you did i forgot

them: "if thats a boy im in love, and if thats a girl im a lesbian."

so ....... that hit like kurtz's diamond bullet. "they will win." sigh. i ended the conversation pretty quickly after that. but not before lamenting about making every single possible wrong choice ever.

but. it wasnt me who made those choices. it was grace. who wasnt called that yet. im trying very hard to not be mad with her but ....... its gonna take awhile. for both of our sakes i hope not 20 years but ..... we'll just have to see.

babysat for some dogs the past couple of days. doesnt pay shit but its low stress and the dogs were cute and cuddly and i got to work on this project. and i didn't have to impress anyone. i didnt even have to talk to anyone. so it was ok. i know its not a real solution but it at least feels manageable.

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